rant and rave from a sweaty woman

I’m going to rant for a minute. It is 88 outside. 79 inside. I have been hinting for the a/c units to be switched because the one we are using freezes up every day. This was not an issue last year. I was drenched in sweat, irritated because I’m so hot and the a/c isn’t working, so I had enough.

I went to the garage and brought in the extra a/c unit. Took out the non-functioning a/c unit, and put the spare in the window. All by my fucking self. No one here to help. I’ll pay for this tomorrow. I won’t be able to move. People with fibro should not be lifting heavy things if they want to remain pain-free.

I don’t know how hubby is going to react. But the temp is already noticeably lower.

Now I have to go make burgers, by hand. I’ve been buying pre-made patties because they are symmetrical. But hubby said that was too expensive, we can make our own. So, I’ll be doing that as soon as I finish up this post.

I also put the pool up today and patched the hole and did a load of laundry.

Can’t say I wasted my day.


I’m on fire

It is currently 84 out. A/C is frozen yet again…  it is 76 in my livingroom. Can’t move without dripping in sweat.

I hate summer. I really, really, do.

One of the things you should not say to a mental health patient

I was reminded of this when a came across a meme on facebook this morning.

When I was first diagnosed, I used all my energy researching what bipolar was. I was going to a psychiatrist as well as a therapist. I was researching all of my medications. I was consumed with what was “wrong” with me.

During that time, my “best friend” didn’t particularly take to kindly with the diagnosis. She thought it was just a quirk of mine that I didn’t sleep and I was hyperfocused on the work I did with her. It made me good at what I did. There was nothing wrong with me. Her husband worked for a troubled youth home. A lot of these kids were medicated, so she felt he was qualified enough to tell me if I was on the correct medications and dosages. Not my psychiatrist. I didn’t need my team. I only needed her. And it was quite frustrating.

You don’t need a therapist. You have me. I will tell you what is wrong and how to fix it for free!

I’m pretty sure I am not the only mentally ill person who has heard this. Hearing things like this is frustration, and to the newbie can be confusing. But in fact, it diminishes the role of the therapist. Implying that ANYONE can do their job.

This can not be further from the truth.

While your friend may have good intentions, this can be a dangerous statement.

Therapists go to school for a long time to learn lots of things. For instance, a layperson would have no idea on how to perform an EMDR session. A layperson is not going to be able to tell you various techniques for anxiety relief or how to negate negative thoughts

A layperson is most likely going to say all the things a mentally ill person should NOT hear. Like, “You should feel lucky, other people have it way worse than you.” or how about “What do you have to be depressed about? Your life is great!” Or another favorite “You just need some good old fashioned fresh-air and to take a walk, then all of your troubles will disappear.”

Therapists are part of our treatment plan. There is nothing wrong with going to a therapist. Sure, you could go on the cheap and get great advice from your friend who has no schooling in mental health, but that is going to leave you worse off than you were to start with. Unless your friend is, in fact, a therapist, and is giving you free sessions, then you are pretty lucky.


Big news… we have a family of raccoons in our backyard. They travel from the neighbor’s yard to our yard. Animal control won’t do anything because they do not have a contract with our city. So… what is one supposed to do when they have wild animals living in their backyard and they have dogs? Pray that there is no fiasco that happens, that’s what.

I need to do something. I’ve been back to sleeping on the couch until noon. I keep telling myself that I am just enjoying my last bits of free time before I start working. It is partly true.

My nephew’s graduation party is this weekend. I just found out about it today. I don’t think we will be going. I think my husband has stuff going on.

I’m on my second pot of coffee. And still dragging ass. LOL

I got a little farther in my book last night. I hadn’t read any since last week. I’m on Chapter 7 now. She is just starting to tell how she met Barack Obama (The book is by Michelle Obama) Maybe I’ll go outside an read a bit in my new chair.

I am looking for my gray tumbler and I can’t find it anywhere. Which means my daughter probably has it.

I did a bit of reading on intermittent fasting. I thought I’d give it a try. Then I read about it. *sigh* I just need to start walking again. I need to get cracking on it.

40 Odd Things

40 odd things about me . . . Please play along! I love reading them!

1. Do you like bleu cheese? Yes

2. Coke or Pepsi? coke

3. Do you own a gun? No

4. What flavor of Koolaid? Grape

5. Hot dogs? If they are Beef

6. Favorite TV show?  Mom

7. Do you believe in ghosts? Yes

8. What do you drink in the morning? Coffee

9. Can you do a push-up? Yes

10. Favorite Jewelry? Rings

11. Favorite hobby? crafts in general

12. Do you have ADD/ADHD? Yes

13. Do you wear glasses? Yes

14.Favorite cartoon character? Hmm… Ruby from Max and Ruby

15. What three things have you done today? Made coffee, did dishes, cleaned bird cage

16. Three drinks you drink all the time? Coffee, iced tea, water

17. Current health worries. All of them

18. Do you believe in magic? Magic and Magick

19. Favorite place to be? Home

20. How did you bring in the New Year? Sleeping

21. Where would you like to visit? Ireland

22. Name four people that will play along: not sure

23. Favorite movies? Too many to list

24. Favorite color? Green

25. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? In the winter

26. Can you whistle? yes

27. Where are you now? home

28. Where would you rather be: on a beach

29. Favorite food: carbs

30. Least favorite chore? scrubbing the toilet

32. What’s in your pockets? Nothing

33. Last thing that made you laugh ? Bella

34. Favorite animal? all of them

35. What’s your most recent injury? None

36. How many TV’s are in your house? 4

37. Worst pain ever? Gallbladder pain

38. Do you like to dance? only when I’ve had too much to drink

39. Are your parents still alive? Yes thankfully.

40. Do you enjoy camping? Sometimes.

Feel free to join in if you like. I found this on fb.

Necessary evil

I want to talk about the necessary evil you must deal with when having a mental illness.


It is a necessity. It is viewed by some to be evil. And there is a lot of stigma surrounding it.

For proper recovery, you need a combination of medication and therapy. You can not, in my personal opinion, live a productive, stable life if you have a mental illness without taking medication.

With the good, there is bad. There are side effects with most medication. You have to decide if the side effects are worth putting up with (if the medication helps) or not.

Most meds cause weight gain. Sorry. I’ve been in so many groups where people ask “Can you recommend a medication that doesn’t have weight gain as a side effect?” The easy answer to this is no. The more complicated answer is yes. Because meds work differently in everyone, results may vary. For instance, for me in the beginning years of taking Latuda, I had no appetite. Couldn’t even think about food. Though I had to force myself to eat because there is a calorie requirement to take it. That was a RARE side effect for this particular medication. And now, after being on it for a few years, the opposite has happened. I take the medication at night and when I wake up I am ready for a breakfast buffet. But then that is all I can eat. Just one meal.

I know you have heard this over and over, but it bears repeating… How one medication works for person A does not mean that is how it will work for person B,D,E, or even Z. There are absolutely NO guarantees.

Some people are medication resistant. Meaning that after numerous tires of various medications there is nothing that will help their symptoms. I’m talking about running through every possible medication arrangement. Some people think if they have tried 2 or 3 medications that haven’t worked, that means they are medication resistant. That is false.

It can take YEARS to find the right medication combination to help you. And then it will probably have to be tweaked while you are on it; either increased or decreased.

Just because you have NOT experienced psychosis, does not mean you should NOT be on an antipsychotic. The name fools a lot of people… “Why am I on an antipsychotic, I’m not psychotic, I don’t have psychosis…” An antipsychotic works similarly to a mood stabilizer. It helps balance things out. Whether or not you are psychotic or have a history of psychosis. Psychosis has no bearing at all on if you are given a prescription for these bad boys… Surprise! And a lot of people will go head to head with me on this. Because a lot of people think they were born with a Ph.D. or MD next to their name.

I have no medical degree. I speak of my own personal experience and my own personal research.

I recommend that if you are on medication and want to go off, TALK WITH YOUR DOCTOR! You need guidance while doing this. These medications can cause serious harm if gone off of cold turkey. I’m talking about illness and even seizures. Don’t play with this. Please! Your doctor can tell you how to go off of medications and can tell you the right way to go about it.

Not interested in medications? That is fine, some people are not a fan. NO HERB WILL CURE YOU OF YOUR MENTAL ILLNESS. Please remember this. There are a lot of snake oil salesmen out there promising cures when it is impossible. If you are going to go about it naturally, I urge you to contact a herbologist or a naturopath so they can tell you the proper amounts of herbs and minerals to take that will make a difference to your mental health.

Take me out to the ballgame

Had a nice time at the ball game today. Had a cheeseburger, potato salad, and some mac and cheese. 1 can of Sierra Mist and 3 waters. We didn’t stay for the whole game, the weather was getting too hot, even if we were in the VIP section. Came home by 5 and made a pot of coffee. When we left the score was 8 to 4 in favor of the visitors.

Hubby is working on finishing up the bathroom right now. I dunno what I am going to do for the rest of my night. I just had to shut the a/c off again because it froze up. *sigh*