Tomorrow I go see the psych nurse. I am so fucking glad.  Remember I had a bit of a spending spree? It FINALLY dawned on me today, that it was the 13th anniversary of my baby, Aeryn’s, birth/death.  I have been a mess otherwise too. but for the most part ok. Until today….

My daughter came over and informed me she has to go to an oncologist. I won’t go into all the details, as I think “oncologist” kind of paints the picture at the moment pretty well. So, after she left, I had a slight panic attack, naturally.

My sister called me tonight to tell me about my nephews meltdown last night. He has ADD. She just kept saying she didn’t know what to do. So, I told her “I am trying to help you, by giving you ideas on WHAT TO DO!”

Most importantly the guy needs to get into therapy, he has started to eat paper. He is a middle child (Marsha, Marsha, Marsha!), and is in an IEP at school. No meds. He doesn’t like how it makes him feel. (Do any of us, really?) And he is telling my sister he is depressed. Well Fuck, get the kid in therapy! He is eating Paper… PICA! Anxiety issues. He isn’t going to work at doing better in school if he is depressed, because he isn’t going to give two fucks about anything. And no, he will NOT be able to tell you WHY he is depressed. Sometimes we just don’t fucking know.

Life. It kicked me hard today, and I am down for the count.

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