yesterday was a better day. Although I am feeling the affects of depression creeping in (short temper, easily agitated, all in all generally fired up, emotional) I am trying to not succumb to it.
My dad was 95% coherent yesterday! I was able to carry on a conversation with him yesterday, he remembered who I was, and who all the grandkids are. There was ONE setback… Apparently, the lady who came in yesterday to give him his communion wafer, looked a lot like me. My dad thought there was a conspiracy again’t him. He didn’t know why someone would impersonate me and be mean to him and tell him that I didn’t love him anymore. Oy vay! He would be fine, and then go back to that whole incident. I had to promise that I would take care of it, and that woman would never come in again! My mom is going to bring him communion from now on, or the priest that they used to work with. He is still determined to break out of the hospital, though.
Seeing him coherent took a huge weight off my shoulders. I feel A LOT better! Time will only tell if it is something that will last, or if he was just having a good day. I am going to call him today. He is super excited that today is opening day for baseball. My mom will be watching the game with him today. He wanted her to bring his ball cap, but my mom said she didn’t think he had one, she would look, but if he didn’t, she would go buy him one.
It is so funny how the mind/body works. The mental exhaustion I feel… It’s like, what is my mind doing that is making it so tired? When you are physically tired, you KNOW why; you did too much physically and you can inventory what you have done. Mentally, you can’t do that. I’m just curious as to how that all works. Maybe I will research that.
So far today, (it is only 7:30 a.m.) I’m feeling tired and wanting to just take some down time today to hopefully get back to my good place. I had finally gotten to a good place; I didn’t need a nap, I was productive, and generally in a decent mood. And then my dad’s issues just kind of shut me down. How can you NOT let something like that set you back? And if you are able to not let it effect you, does that make you less of a person?
I’m not sure if any of this blog makes any sense. They are just thoughts I’m jotting down….
Here is to hoping for a better day. Not just for me and my family, but for all of you! We are all fighting our own battles… I hope today you get some relief from what ever battle you are fighting.