I’m so excited! Tomorrow is Pdoc day! I think Dr. Gainer will be quite happy that the med increase is going good for the most part. I really want to talk to her about getting into some therapy to combat the depression since I recognize the pattern. I think therapy could help immensely with that.
Sad —-> depressed —-> guilt —-> self-loathing thoughts ——> suicidal thoughts rinse, repeat for three days.
If I could just get past the guilt I think I would be ok. But that guilt really clings onto me and goes downhill quick from there. I think she will be happy that I have finally recognized my pattern and that I want to do something about it.
I just hope I don’t have to go on Free Clinic day, which would mean that I would have to get there as soon as they open, and sit and wait until a therapist is free to see me.
So I am super excited to go. I am a little nervous about my med refills. I am afraid they won’t be here in time for vacation, and I don’t have enough to last between now and the end of vacation.
I cleaned bathrooms today and did a quick load of laundry. I have another load I could do, but it is already incredibly hot in my house since in order to use the dryer I have to turn off the air condition. (We have central air, but we have needed a new unit for 5 years, so we are using window units until… well, probably forever to be honest.)
Tomorrow the in-laws arrive and then graduation day is FRIDAY!!!!!