Today has been a rough day. I had to put on my boxing gloves and fight toe to toe with this depression. I woke up irritated, annoyed, and sad. I decided I wasn’t going to let that take me down. I was going to fight. All to often I submit to the depression, let it wash over me. Today I wanted to try something different.

I started by calling to make my therapy appointment. To my surprise, they could have gotten me in TODAY! But it was too short notice and I made my appointment for the Monday after we get back from vacation. June 19…. the day before my birthday.

I have been drinking copious amounts of coffee, and it is just like drinking water. No effect. Still moving at a snails pace.

I went to the store to grab what I needed to make tacos for dinner tomorrow.

I came home and made cinnamon rolls.

I did three loads of laundry.

I made dinner.

All the while, jabbing and hooking my way through the day. Bobbing and weaving, managing NOT to get knocked down for the count.

Guess what? I’m still depressed. Even after the long embrace that my husband gave me.

No suicidal thoughts, so that is a plus. Must be that the Latuda is working. By the way I got that in the mail today. And the husband rented an SUV today, we pick it up Saturday, the day we leave.

Right now I am listening to some new Alt-J, and I’m not impressed. I will have to listen again when I am in a better mood.

Depression sucks. I have no idea why I have been given this “gift” in this lifetime. It would be great if some hypomania came around soon.

I’m a little dismayed that I wasn’t able to work through it. I’m a little saddened that even fighting this all day, it is still here. It didn’t go away. Next time I am just going to wallow in my misery.

 

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3 thoughts on “”

    1. vacation was good. This was the first time in years that I managed to NOT get sunburned! We went at a great time, the weather was nice and not too hot yet.

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